Saturday, December 12, 2015

Lesson learned.

- Captured from Belait -

panda 46


Today, 13.12.15

The day I break myself from the internet ( not all sites, just twitter, whatsapp. Still on youtube and obviously, this site. ) 

Yesterday, was the day, I think I finally quit league. For some reasons. I have done watching my anime ; Acchi Kocchi. Don't ask me if Im still reading my books, I do, but books make me sleepy. Hence, I never really finished a book at this time. The day, my dad was acting so weird throughout the day, and I started to worry. It was weird. Really weird. I could say the day I was so emotionally unstable. I could easily burst into tears. I didn't exactly know why. Just me and my sensitivity. It's the time of the month guys! You know what I mean. 

I used to play league to distract me from thinking, over thinking, sadness or just really for fun playing with my friends. But not today, I feel bad for my friends, I seriously feel bad. I couldn't make it to even click the 'Launch' button and not even clicking League of Legends. To my friends from league, I'm sorry, even though you guys don't even know this blog exists.

I want to pour my feels here, so if you're not that interested with my entries, I'm sorry you've bumped to a wrong blogger. 


The thing that I have been waiting for, I finally got it.

The answer.

Been confused since forever, I finally got the answer.

I stopped.

I was thinking if my day could get any worse. From quitting league, no anime left to watch, my dad acting strange.

And then this thing happened.

The only ayah I've been holding onto despite all the problems I was going through.

And I believe after all these problems, there will always be a hikmah. Always be. Always waiting.

The thing I used to believe in, has been crushed.

I could do nothing. Just nothing. I said to myself I can only just go with the flow. Unbelievable, thanks to league of legends, you did a really good job on distracting me from my feelings, really do.

Too bad I quit playing it.

Those night texts hit me hard. The feelings I have forgotten called me back.

After I quit league. GG.

'Just go with the flow' thingy, don't really work this time, without league and finally with an answer.

I, somehow feel free. It was a blessing. Alhamdulillah for those memories. 

and to you, if you're reading this, I thank you for your existence since 2013, and popped out March, 2014. Without you, I wouldn't be any stronger from the early '15 up until now. I appreciate, a lot.

Allah is the best planner after all. 
No doubt.


To all my friends out there, sorry for not replying your texts on whatsapp and telegram and sooo on. Im terribly sorry. I think I need a some time alone and internet-free day. Or days. Just maybe.

I hope you guys understand.


- Anani Mos -

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